inevitably, at the start of every semester i always get the creeps.
butterflies always seem to find their way into my stomach and worry always seeps into the back of my mind, slowly building up and soon engulfing all my thoughts.

this semester is no different.

already my science fiction module is driving me nuts.
i figured since im gonna have a hard time reading books that dont interest me even the slightest bit i might as well get them first and get done reading all of them.
i didnt know how hard a time i would have ploughing through the meaningless (at least to me) words that are as good as neverending.
to begin with, all the books cost me a whooping $160. when i paid for the books i felt as though a really sharp dagger pierced right through me.
i mean..already i cant bear to buy books..what more spending so much on books that i will probably never ever read again in my entire life.
doesnt help that all the money is coming out of my own pocket.
tsk.
the first book in the list is titled a most peculiar and mind-boggling "a canticle for leibowitz".
if that sounds even vaguely interesting to you, tell me, i'll sell you the book for a dollar once im done with the module. or maybe i'll just give it to you for free. just get it out of my life!
lets see if i get the story so far..its about a monk..who out in the desert meets a stranger..and through the stranger finds a secret underground shelter that belonged to the time before the deluge..and the monks of that time spent hours examining past relics..but no one believed him at first..and the head abbot even asked him to shut up about what he found..but many years later people from the New Rome come knocking on the abbey's door asking to further investigate what the young monk found..blah blah etc..
does that sound appealing to you? gosh.

ok. im not exactly that sore about it. i chose to do the module so if i really suck at it and have to drag myself to the lecture and tutorials every week i have no one to blame but myself.
but then again, i just dont wanna keep doing stuff that i like or am familiar with.
education is about the training of the mind, and if i dont expose myself to something outside i'll never actually learn anything new will i?

the other two lit modules im really looking forward to.
especially asian american literature. ive always been a fan of asian literature. though they keep repeating the same ideas of ill-treated stepchildren, forced marriages, sexist attitudes and war.
oh well. we'll see. things are usually only as interesting and fun as you make them to be.
by the way, anyone has The Joy Luck Club or Great Expectations that i can borrow?

ok. im back to my feeble attempt of reading my lit text.
only about 19 more chapters to go.
help.