Uni life...

I really dont think im ready...

Uni life has barely started..its only been on week to be exact..
but already i dread it..

i think im really not ready in terms of my attitude to embrace this new chapter in my life..
im not exactly being sociable nor am i willing to try and make new friends..
maybe its the lack of self-confidence crap and the serious deprivation of self-esteem thats holding me back..
i keep having this feeling that someone or rather everyone is looking at me with a critical eye..
maybe im just being overshadowed..
im definately not as crazy as michele or as loud and funny as gina..
and perhaps no one needs or wants to know someone who is trying to be sane and a little more serious about school life..
thats just boring aint it..

i dont feel like joining any cca or club or organization or whatever..
i just dont think i'll be able to take it alone..
im such a sheep..going wherever people go..trying not to do stuff when i perceive im gonna be stuck in an uncomfortable position..
O week was a complete dread..
michele says im not giving the people a chance..
sure theyre nice and all..
but again i say..
im just not someone anyone would want to know..

not as crazy.
not as fun.
not as enthu.
not as sporting.
not as eager.
not as cool.
not as pretty.
not as rich.
not as popular.

im just not.